According To You
by SVUCSIWTRDOOLluver
Summary: This is a Kevin/Garcia story at first, but it will evolve into Morgan/Garcia and if you squint there's H/P and R/JJ. Basically, Kevin is being a supreme jerk to Garcia at the annual Christmas Ball. Can the BAU rescue her? COMPLETE
1. I'm Stupid and Useless

**This is my very first Criminal Minds story! Yay! I got hooked on the show over the summer with reruns, and now I am freaking out and cannot wait for the new season to start! Emily's coming back and so is JJ!**

**Definitely Morgan/Garcia at the end, and Hotch/Emily and Reid/JJ if you squint. Beginning is Kevin/Garcia, but I'm definitely making Kevin into a jerk.**

**Enjoy!**

The FBI annual Christmas Ball was coming up, and the invitations had been sent out months in advance so no one in the BAU had been able to get out of it. And bringing a date was strongly recommended, if not required, even if it was just a friend.

So, of course, the three BAU girls got together and started planning. JJ and Garcia managed to get Hotch and Emily alone at the perfect moment and he asked her to be his date at the Ball, and she happily agreed. And then Emily and Garcia shoved Reid into the conference room that JJ was about to enter and Reid somehow managed to audibly ask JJ to the Ball and she grinned and said yes.

But when Emily and JJ tried to get Morgan to ask Garcia, something went wrong.

"Hey baby girl," Morgan said, knocking on Garcia's door and leaning casually against the door frame.

"Hey there Hot Stuff. What can I do ya for?" She asked, swiveling around to face her Chocolate Adonis.

"Well, this stupid Ball thing is coming up, and since we're basically required to have a date, you wanna go with me?"

"You-you're asking me to the Ball?" She asked in disbelief, and when he nodded with a shrug she raised her eyebrows. "Why?"

"Because we're pretty much required to have a date and neither of us do," He said with a chuckle, and Garcia felt her hackles rise.

"So that is the only reason," She stated, her eyes going flat, cold and narrow.

"Well, of course I want to-"

"Did it ever occur to you that just maybe a guy might've asked me just because he likes me? Just for that simple reason,"

"Garcia," He protested, and she stood up, hot fury now dancing dangerously in her eyes.

"I may be the girl you take only when you absolutely have to and you have no other options, but to other men I am their first choice!" She spat, pushing past him towards the door that meant freedom from the stifling room.

"Who?" Morgan demanded, grabbing her arm. She ripped her arm out of his grasp and snapped,

"Not that it's any of your business, but Kevin Lynch," Garcia all but screamed and she gave him a hard shove and stormed out of the room, furious tears glittering in her eyes.

JJ and Emily were standing outside of her office and Garcia looked at them, saying angrily, "Matchmaking is the stupidest thing we have ever done!"

She stormed off, fighting back tears but being unsuccessful. JJ and Emily traded glances and made the unanimous decision that Emily would go smack Morgan while JJ would go after Garcia.

Garcia hurriedly rushed through the BAU area, her target the door and then the elevator. She made it to the elevator and kept jabbing at the button. "Was Garcia crying?" Reid said, bewildered, and Hotch and Rossi exchanged glances before Hotch strode after Garcia. He reached her just as the elevator door opened and she stumbled inside. JJ came jogging up and Hotch held up a hand as he stepped after Garcia in the elevator and the doors slid shut.

"Go away, Hotch," Garcia whispered, sitting down in the corner of the elevator and covering her face with her hands.

"Well, seeing as we're in an elevator, Garcia, I can't really go anywhere," Hotch said, and Garcia muttered,

"There's the next floor, then you can go away," She sniffed, and he hit the stop button on the elevator so it halted and Garcia glared up at him. "I hate you."

"Yeah, sure you do," He said, rolling his eyes as he sat down next to her. "Are you going to tell me what Morgan did?"

"Oh, why not? JJ and Emily were trying to get me and Morgan to go to that ball thing together, and when he asked me he was like 'since I've got no one else to go with, will you go with me?' and I couldn't believe his audacity! He waltzes into my office and all but expects me to go with him just because he couldn't find a real date. The nerve of that man! He thinks that I can't find a man who might like me ask me to the ball because I'm me, not because I'm a last resort!"

Hotch sighed and patted her knee gently. "He's a jerk, Penelope, and an idiot. I'm sure he didn't mean it like he said, he just wanted to keep it casual since he doesn't want it to be,"

"Don't you dare defend him," She said, getting to her feet and hitting the start button so the elevator continued to move.

"All right, I'm sorry," He apologized, and she pulled him to his feet.

"But thanks, Hotch, you did make me feel better," She said with a bright smile.

"Good." Hotch replied with a small smile as he watched her walk off, obviously still angry at Morgan.

The Christmas Ball was in a few days, and though Morgan tried his best to apologize, Garcia wouldn't have any of it. Eventually he cornered her after work one day and he said, "I know you don't want to listen to me, but just hear me out for 2 minutes, okay?"

"I'm timing you." She replied crisply, looking down at her watch.

"I'm sorry, Penelope, about what I said when I asked you to the ball. I wanted to keep it casual because I didn't want you thinking that you had to just because I asked you. You were actually my first choice, baby girl, but I was an idiot and I dragged my ass until Emily and JJ got it moving. I know you're going with Kevin, and I just want to ask if you'll save one dance for me,"

She eyed him for a long moment and then smiled, saying, "Of course, my Chocolate Adonis, I believe I still have some room left on my dance card,"

He sighed in relief and wrapped his arms around her, saying quietly, "I really am sorry,"

"Oh, I know, and you're forgiven. But that's twice you've pulled a stunt like that, sugar, once more and you strike out!" She said sweetly and he chuckled.

"All right, mama, I'll be careful. Got any plans tonight?"

"Nope, Kevin's working late. What've you got in mind, hot stuff?"

"Well, I was thinking," He led her off towards the elevator and they made plans for a movie and popcorn night at Morgan's place.

Finally the Christmas Ball arrived, and when Kevin went to pick up Garcia, she wasn't ready. He stood in the living room, complaining, "You're never on time, Penelope, I can't take you anywhere without being late! I've really got to impress my bosses tonight if I want to get back in their good graces after the whole leaving-and-coming-back fiasco, which would've never happened if you had just gone with me! We would've been an unstoppable team, with you backing me,"

Garcia just tried to block it all out as she finished her makeup, grabbed her purse and walked out. "Well? How do I look?" She asked, twirling for Kevin.

Penelope Garcia was a knockout in a satin red dress that had short sleeves and fit snugly against her skin all the way down to above her knees. Her blonde hair was swept up into an elegant up-do with a few curled tendrils hanging around her face. She ditched the glasses for the evening and put the contacts in that she was getting used to. Her make-up was flawless, and it should have been, considering the twenty minutes she had spent on it. In the spirit of Christmas, she had a green bow in her hair, she was wearing green heels, her nails were painted green and the green purse she held in her hands completed the ensemble.

"You'll do," He said in a clipped tone and hurried her out the door. "You look like a mess in that dress, Penelope, couldn't you have chosen something a little more appropriate? Never mind, you don't have time to change. Do something with your hair in the car, will you? And you forgot half of your makeup," He criticized on the way to the Ball.

"All right," She said quietly, having learned that it was better to let him steam on without contradicting him.

When they walked in, he groaned and said, "You can't be on time even if it would save your life. Everyone's already here, we're so late,"

They walked over to the BAU table and Garcia smiled, seeing Hotch and Emily, Reid and JJ, and Morgan and Rossi were sitting alone without dates. JJ waved to Garcia and mouthed, "Sit next to me!" and Garcia started over towards them Kevin pulled hard on her arm and said,

"We have to sit with my bosses, Penelope! I told you I have to impress them! Don't be all geeky and start talking about stuff that no one cares about, okay?" He pulled her over towards the other table and Garcia glanced back, seeing everyone at the BAU table looking at her with a mixture of concern, bewilderment and confusion. She tried to shrug apologetically at them but Kevin turned her around and introduced her to his bosses.

Before the food was served, Garcia started telling some jokes and when the food started arriving, Kevin poked her and hissed, "You suck at telling jokes because you always give it away! They're laughing at you, not with you!"

After that, she fell silent, trying not to give Kevin any more ammunition against her. She knew in the back of her mind that what Kevin said to her wasn't true, but when people put you down enough, you start to believe it. He kept telling her how she was making mistakes, and when she tried to fix them, he found something else that was wrong with her.

When they had finished eating, Kevin hissed in her ear again, "You're being boring and moody! God, can I take you anywhere? Go get us some drinks and I'll try to repair the damage you've done,"

Silently Garcia got up and headed across the room. JJ and Emily saw their chance and immediately bolted it over to her, walking with her to the drinks area. "Listen to me, Penelope Garcia, you are beautiful and incredible," JJ said firmly, and Emily added,

"You are funny and irresistible to men, especially a certain Derek Morgan,"

"You are everything the BAU wants and needs in a technical analyst," JJ began and Emily finished with,

"And you are everything that we could have ever asked for in a friend,"

"You guys," Garcia whispered and wrapped her arms around them both. "I know what he's been saying isn't true, but he kept saying it and it just got ingrained into my brain until I think I actually started to believe it," She murmured, and when she drew back, Emily checked Garcia's makeup to see if she had smudged any of it.

She hadn't, so Emily and JJ sent her back to Kevin with a fresh outlook and a feeling of being quite fed up with a certain technical analyst.

"You took too long," Kevin hissed when she sat back down next to him. "I saw you talking to those two BAU agents you know. Honestly, Penelope, I think you should transfer over to my division, those insane BAU agents that really belong in a mental institution are ruining you,"

**Yeah, I know, I made Kevin OOC, but in my head I could see him saying this stuff if he went off the deep end and turned mean. Honestly, I think I just don't like him because he's standing in the way of Morgan and Garcia being together, so I made him out to be a bad guy in this story so Garcia could kick him to the curb. Thanks so much for reading and I hope you're liking my two-shot so far!**


	2. I'm Beautiful and Incredible

**The second and last chapter of this two-shot. Now we get to see Garcia kick Kevin to the curb and go straight back into the arms of her beloved BAU family. And if you didn't notice in the last chapter, most of the stuff Kevin, JJ and Emily said to Garcia came from a song I really like called "According To You" by Orianthi.**

**Enjoy!**

And that was Penelope Garcia's final straw.

"You know what, Kevin? According to them, I'm beautiful and incredible and funny and irresistible. According to you, I'm stupid and useless and I can't do anything right." She said heatedly, getting right in his face.

"Sometimes you act like it! Don't make a scene," He warned and she rolled her eyes, standing up and pulling him with her. She jabbed her finger into his chest and said,

"Those 'insane BAU agents that really belong in a mental institution' as you said, are not ruining me, in fact they are my family. You can insult me all you want, but when you start slinging mud at my family, that's when you're done."

"Insults? It's the truth!" Kevin argued, and by that time nearly everyone in the Ball was watching the argument, especially the BAU table.

"Ha! You think you know what the truth is? Well here are some truths for you; the truth is I don't love you. The truth is you don't love me. The truth is that we're just together because you think you can convince me to go back to your little farm with you, keep house and clean for you, marry you and have kids and grow old together just because it's convenient for you. The truth is that I will never do any of that with you, because you have been a mean son of bitch to me and I won't spend the rest of my life being put down. I really hope you find a girl that is as mean as you and then you two can settle down and spend the rest of your miserable lives insulting each other."

"Penelope that's not fair!" Kevin yelled, and Penelope rolled her eyes.

"Fair isn't the issue here, Kevin. You know, I'm done talking to you. Lose my phone number, lose my address, in fact lose everything you know about me, because believe me, that's what I'll be doing with you and your phone number and your memories. Now if you're excuse me, and even if you won't I really don't care, I'm going to sit with the people that actually care about me."

She turned and went to stride away. "Penelope if you walk away from me, don't expect me to take you back when you come back crawling for me," Kevin warned, though his voice was full of doubt. Garcia stopped in her tracks and turned around with a scary smile on her face.

"You're really trying to tell me I've got something to lose by walking away? You can't tell me what I've got to lose, because there is nothing. I've got everything to gain by walking right over there," She pointed to the BAU table "And sitting down and forgetting about you. Now I'm going to go dance with my family, and you had best keep the hell away from me. Goodbye Kevin."

Now she walked and she didn't look back and she didn't stop once until she was at the BAU table and she slid gracefully onto the seat between JJ and Emily. She didn't notice that when she stood up, Morgan bolted to his feet and it took Rossi and Hotch holding his arms to keep from going over to Kevin and punching him and then rescuing his baby girl. And when Garcia called Kevin a 'mean son of a bitch' Hotch and Rossi nearly let Morgan go and went with him, but JJ and Emily stood up and held them back. Reid was the only one sitting by the end of Garcia's rant and while he looked utterly confused at first, understanding cleared the cobwebs when JJ explained everything to him, and then he stood up as Garcia bolted towards the BAU table.

Applause broke out across the room and Garcia dropped her head onto her arms until the applause died out and conversations started back up. Soon the room was buzzing like it had before with the music playing and Garcia lifted her head up.

"God that felt good," She sighed, and everyone broke out into a smile. JJ and Emily scooted their chairs closer to Garcia and they each grabbed onto one of her hands.

"Good girl," Emily said, squeezing Garcia's right hand and JJ squeezed her left, saying,

"You said something about dancing with us, didn't you?"

"Yes I did," Garcia said happily and pulled JJ onto the dance floor as an upbeat song came on. The two girls danced with each other for a while and then Emily went to join in on the fun.

"Did you know about Kevin?" Rossi asked Morgan back at the table, and Morgan shook his head, his jaw clenched.

"No but I think I'll be paying him a visit real soon. Verbal abuse is just as bad as physical abuse, it just doesn't leave a mark," Morgan spat, and Hotch nodded, his eyes cold as ice as he watched Kevin gather his stuff up and both he and Morgan tensed when he stopped and watched Garcia dance with a sulky expression in his eyes. And then he disappeared out the door.

"He's not a type that will go for revenge. He's just going to slither back into his cave, so to speak, and lick his wounds. I doubt he'll even talk to Garcia again, for fear of another public scene like the one that just happened," Reid said thoughtfully, and Morgan nodded.

"He better not, or he'll have to answer to me."

"To all of us." Hotch corrected, and Morgan agreed.

Rossi got up and said, "Sorry, Morgan, but I'm stealing your thunder," He walked over to the three dancing girls and asked Garcia to dance with him. She agreed as Hotch went to dance with Emily and JJ came to the table and dragged Reid to the dance floor.

"You know, you think of us as your family, but you do know that we think of you as family too right?" Rossi asked as he and Garcia danced around.

"Yeah, I know," She said, smiling at him. "I really was in love with Kevin, before, and then he came back and he changed. He was angry at the world so he took it out on me. And before you can ask, no I haven't been reading Reid's psychology books,"

He chuckled and twirled her around one last time as the song ended. Hotch and Emily came dancing by and suddenly Garcia found herself in Hotch's arms and saw that Emily was dancing away with Rossi. "Nice switch-up," Garcia said in appreciation and Hotch chuckled.

"Thanks," Then he got serious and asked, "Why didn't you come to me with this, Penelope?"

"Because I didn't think it was that big of a deal, and that's the truth. I thought he was just being a jerk and that I could handle it. I handled Morgan and his jerkiness well enough, didn't I? Well, obviously I couldn't handle Kevin's jerkiness," She said quietly as she settled her head on his shoulder.

"He wasn't being a jerk, Penelope, he was being mean, flat out mean. Please don't tell me you're blaming yourself," Hotch said quickly, and Garcia immediately said,

"Oh no, it's all Kevin's fault, I know that. I'm just sorry that I believed what he said."

"What did he say?"

"A hell of a lot," She sighed, and when he was silent she continued, saying, "For example, when I was getting dressed he was saying that he can't take my anywhere because I'm always late, and when I came out he told me that I would do, but I needed to do something with my hair and finish my makeup and that I needed to wear something more appropriate but that I didn't have time to change. And when we got here, he wouldn't let me sit with you guys because he needed to impress his bosses. When I tried to joke with them, he told me that I suck at telling jokes, and then when I stopped talking he told me I was being boring and moody. Any other examples? I've got plenty," She said, and Hotch just held her tighter.

"You weren't late, Penelope, and if you were then so what? No one really cares. You and your hair and your makeup and your dress are perfect, not that I have much experience in those matters, and next time when a guy tries to do that to you, I want you to slap him hard." Hotch said firmly, and Garcia grinned.

"Thanks, boss-man. You sure know how to make a girl feel special."

The song ended and Garcia spotted JJ and Reid dancing nearby. She winked at Hotch and grabbed JJ's arms, spinning her into Hotch's arms and grabbing Reid's hands as an up tempo song came on. "Let's dance, genius," She said happily and as they danced Reid said quietly,

"I know you're tired of hearing about Kevin, but if something like that happens to you again, will you promise that you'll tell me?"

"Only if you'll make the same promise in return. I hate watching you guys come back from a case with the burdens on your shoulders and when you won't let me help with those burdens, it hurts me even more." Garcia said just as quietly.

"All right. Deal." He said and they shook hands.

"Deal. Now, enough with the heavy stuff, let's dance!" She exclaimed, grabbing his hands again and spinning him around.

Meanwhile, Morgan had gotten up from the table quietly when Rossi had gotten up to dance with Garcia. Hotch gave him a warning look which Morgan ignored as he followed Kevin outside. Morgan silently walked up behind the man and suddenly grabbed him, shoving him against the wall of the building and making sure he couldn't escape.

"What the hell, man?" Kevin demanded, struggling against Morgan's iron-clad grip.

"If you ever go near my girl again, it will be the last thing you ever do. I'll let you live this time, but I swear to God, if you ever say something bad about her or to her or even lay a finger on her, I will find you, Lynch, and I will finish you. Got it?" Morgan said in a deadly, dangerous voice.

"I got it," Lynch muttered sullenly, and Morgan quickly brought his knee up and rammed it into Kevin's crotch. He let out a scream and Morgan let him go.

"Don't forget what I said," Morgan spat and walked back into the hall, straightening his tie and calming himself down as hey stepped through the door and saw as Garcia managed to trip on her heels when spinning herself around and as Reid caught her. Then the music ended, another song began playing with the words,

"According to you, I'm stupid, I'm useless, I can't do anything right,"

She searched the dance floor and saw JJ and Emily hurrying towards her with grins on their faces. Garcia knew immediately that they had requested that song especially for her and the three girls began dancing, singing along to the song as loud as they could.

When they started singing, "But according to him," They turned to the BAU table and JJ pointed to Reid, Emily pointed to Hotch and Garcia pointed to Morgan, each of them bending their finger and beckoning their men to the dance floor. As the three of them got up and headed towards the three girls they kept singing,

"According to him, I'm beautiful, incredible, he can't get me out of his head, according to him, I'm funny, irresistible, everything he ever wanted, everything is opposite, I don't feel like stopping it, baby tell me what I've got to lose, he's into me for everything I'm not, according to you,"

Hotch spun Emily around as JJ wrapped her arms around Reid's neck and they all began dancing. Garcia felt hands grab her waist and spin her around until she was looking into the eyes of her Chocolate Adonis, Derek Morgan.

"Hey there Hot Stuff," She said with a grin and he laughed.

"Hey there Baby Girl," He said with an equal grin and it was her turn to laugh. They kept dancing to the song until Garcia turned around and grabbed JJ's and Emily's hands and they started to sing,

"I need to feel appreciated, that I'm not hated, oh no! Why can't you see me through his eyes, it's too bad you're making me decide!"

They danced wildly with each other during the guitar solo while Rossi came up to join them and the four men watched their BAU girls dance crazily together. Eventually they stopped dancing and sang, "But according to me, you're stupid, you're useless, you can't do anything right,"

Then they spun around and pointed to their respective men, singing, "But according to him, I'm beautiful, incredible, he can't get me out of his head, according to him, I'm funny, irresistible, everything he ever wanted,"

Morgan pulled Garcia into his arms and held her close and sang along quietly in her ear, though he changed a few words, singing, "According to me, you're beautiful, incredible, I can't get you out of my head, according to me, you're funny, irresistible, everything I ever wanted,"

She squeezed her eyes shut and hugged Morgan as tightly as she could. He drew her head back and, before he lost his nerve, captured her lips with his. Garcia wrapped her arms around his neck and drew him closer as the other BAU members whistled.

"What about those stupid rules?" Garcia mumbled against Morgan's lips and he mumbled back,

"Rules, shmules, they'd let us get married and have dozens of kids before they'd lose either one of our amazingly awesome talents,"

Garcia grinned and said, "I agree," as they drew back and he pressed his lips to her forehead.

"I'm going to tell you every day that you're beautiful and incredible and funny and irresistible and everything I ever wanted, and I'm going to tell you every day that I can't get you out of my head, and I will mean every single word that comes out of my mouth." He promised, and she felt tears welling in her eyes. She blinked them back furiously and kissed Morgan again the seal the deal.

"Ah, I love you Derek Morgan," She sighed as they swayed slowly to a slow song.

"I love you too, Penelope Garcia," He murmured, pressing his lips to her forehead as they continued revolving on the spot.

**I'm happy with this story, because I managed to fit in some M/G loving! I really hope you enjoyed this story, and thank you so much for reading! Leave me some comments, let me know if I did okay with writing Kevin as a major jerk or not. Thanks!**


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